The reason why

 I'm on day 76. My head is clearer than it has been in years and I think I understand this alcohol thing a bit better. I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination but I do have a theory for all the people out there who didn't like themselves when they were drinking but they couldn't seem to stop. Here it is.....

I think you need to dig really deep and find out why you started in the first place. I don't mean why you started drinking. Everyone dabbles when they are young. I mean the binge drinking. The pain deadener. The anaesthetic that blocks out the things that are too painful to think about. 

In my experience, in the words of the Gruffalo, you can't go under it, you can't go over it, you have to go through it! I've been in therapy for a year and I am just starting to realise that I used alcohol to mask the pain of life experiences.

We're all different and we all drink for different reasons, but it's not called drowning your sorrows for nothing x 

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